YAY! After a very emotional afternoon, I went to pick the kids up from school and almost cried at Speedy’s door. Speedy’s teacher told me that “he had his best day ever!” yesterday. He listened, followed directions and did what he was supposed to do. Woo Hoo! I was so fired up! Yay, Speedy!
About this whole baby thing. Wow. ANYTHING could happen. I have no idea how far along she is or if she is even for sure pregnant. Only time will tell. I guess we may know more in a couple of weeks with GrannyJ comes back to town and sees them again. It’s a strange place to be in – knowing the possibilities and even the likelihood that this baby will enter foster care and be placed with us. If there even is a baby.
You know what I want you to do….let’s go ahead and start now, claiming Jeremiah 29:11 on behalf of this child. “‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord. ‘They are for good and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.’”
It’s an odd place to be. We could have another baby. Or not. And I’m fine either way. We’ll be thrilled to welcome a new child in our home and we’ll also be thrilled with our family of four.
Filed under: Anticipation, Anxiety, Preparing for kids, adoption, bio family
Shock.
Excitement.
Fear.
Longing.
Uncertainty.
Hopeful.
Sick.
Thrilled.
These are just some of the things you feel when you find out that the birthmother of your children is pregnant again. Knowing that in Texas, CPS will automatically take custody of a child born to parents who have already had their parental rights terminated by the court. Knowing that the first place CPS will look to place this child is with the adoptive parents of the siblings.
Please pray for the health and safety of this unborn child.
Filed under: Child Advocates
I visited with Stella’s new foster mom yesterday in her home and I really like her. She seems to be a Godly woman whose heart is in the right place as she works to restore these kids. In fact, she has 9 brothers and sisters and most of them are foster parents. They all get together every Sunday after church.
I’m not sure how to put it into words, but there seems to be something very special about this home. The mom is very positive and seems to take every opportunity to fill these girls with love. I can’t remember her exact words, but she told me about a conversation she had with Stella where Stella said she was “different”. The foster mom explained to Stella something along the lines of “I am different because I am always positive. And I’m going to pour out of myself into you all the love and hope and positive thoughts I can muster.”
There is a schedule and everything is very well organized. Stella is going to hate it. But I think if she can stick it out that it’s exactly the kind of evironment she needs.
Keep praying.
Filed under: Child Advocates
What did you do this weekend? Hang out with your family? Spend time with some dear friends? Maybe help your kids with school work? Maybe you still take classes and you had to catch up with your own school work? Stella moved to her NINTH placement in 10 months. She is fifteen years old.
Do you remember high school? I mean, do you really remember? The insecurities, the desire to just fit in, the difficulty in knowing who your friends really were?
School started about two months ago. That is approximately 8 weeks. Stella has been to 3 different schools, 3 different placements, 3 different sets of rules, friends, etc…. She is now at her fourth placement (just since school started) and will be starting her FOURTH school. She’s already started over four times and hasn’t even made it through the second six weeks.
While we went on with life as normal, Stella was making this latest move. She is devestated right now and emotionally exhausted. Please continue to pray for her and for her new foster mom.
In the meantime, two family members have decided that CPS is not meeting Stella’s needs (DUH) and each has seperately asked to start the process of getting custody of Stella. There is a very good chance that one of these family members will be a good placement for her – the other I’m not too sure about. I mean, after giving up and refusing to accept responsibility for a child, it’s difficult for me to send that child back to you. Not that it is my decision – I have no power, only influence. Anyway, it will be interesting to see what unfolds over the next few weeks. Just please pray for the whole situation and also for wisdom and discernment for me and for the CPS caseworker.
Wouldn’t it be great if we could get Stella into a permanent home before Christmas? Maybe there is still a chance.
Sadly, Stella represents only one of a number of kids just like her in care. Most of them without an advocate working on their behalf. The thing is, as a volunteer advocate, I’m no miracle worker – I don’t do anything extraordinary. I’m just there. For each placement, for each transition, for each anything, I am there. I’m cheering her on, listening to her and loving her the best I can. But mainly, I’m just there. Her caseworker will change. Her placements will change. Her schools will change. Her doctors will change. Her therapists will change. Her volunteer Child Advocate will stay the same. I gather information and coordinate all the new service providers. I follow up to make sure she is getting therapy and seeing doctors and so on. Tomorrow morning, I’ll make calls to try and get her registered at a new school – a process that can sometimes take days for workers to get to. When you move to 4 different schools in the first two months, missing days each time as you wait for registration information to change hands can lead to missing weeks of school and failing. And the last thing any teenager in foster care needs is to get another grade behind. As it stands now, Stella will not graduate high school before she turns 18; once she turns 18, she will no longer be able to be in foster care.
I could go on and on and on. But it’s late and I’m tired and you are probably tired of hearing me complain. If you want to help, pray. If you want to contribute to Child Advocates so that more kids can have a consistent person advocating for them, you can do that here. It doesn’t take much to make a difference.
Maybe you’ve been reading about Stella for a while and you’ve decided you’d like to get more information about becoming and advocate yourself. Child Advocates is a national organization so I’m sure there is one close to you. Email me or leave me a comment if you want help finding out more about how you can become a volunteer. Hey, if I don’t meet my fundraising goal of $5000 for the marathon, but I get even one more person to become an advocate, I’ll consider my venture a huge success.
Filed under: Child Advocates
You are breaking my heart.
It’s 1:15am and I just got home from un unexpected visit to the foster home. Where I talked with an emotionally distraught Stella, witnessed an unbearably emotional exchange between foster mom and another foster daughter who had been with her for THREE YEARS, spoke with three different police officers and spoke with a heart broken foster mom.
Needless to say, Stella is moving yet again. Through sobbing, she told me she “just couldn’t do it anymore” – that she didn’t want to have to start all over again with meeting new people, new parents, new school, etc… and on top of everything else, she has a boyfriend she is leaving behind this time. Someone she describes as “so sweet” and who makes her whole face light up when she mentions his name.
All four kids in this home are being moved because of some very bad choices on the kids’ part. I’m sad for Stella. I’m shocked that the foster parents are so shocked about what was going on. And I am absolutely heart broken that a girl who has lived with this family for THREE YEARS is being forced to leave by the foster parents because they are hurting. And I know they are truly hurting – I could see it in their eyes. But it’s just not about them. I can see them sending three away because they aren’t as emotionally invested…..and although every move is bad for these kids, for the three it is just another move. For the fourth, the one who has been there so long, this is abandonment – from someone she loved and trusted.
So now I’m curious. Put one boy and three girls – all teenagers, all serious issues of neglect/abuse/abandonment by birth families, at least two with a history of se#ually acting out, all in foster care – put them together under one roof and leave them unsupervised for any amount of time whatsoever…..what do YOU think is going to happen? When you go to sleep at night and the kids are all upstairs, what do you think is happening? When you leave them for even just an hour to run an errand, what do you think is happening?
Why are you so surprised?
As a foster parent, is it okay for you to put kids out of your house because they have disappointed you in such a big way? Granted, there is no way they could continue to have both the boy and the girls in the home. But the one who’d been with you for three years? What message are you sending that poor child? I love until….. I love you unless…. At what point does a “foster parent” have to face up to the same accountability as parent? I guess what really gets me about this is that these really are good foster parents. And they truly are heart broken right now. Devastated. They did treat these kids as if they were their own….. I’m just wondering, if this one girl in particular, if she were their biological child and the same thing happened, would they put her out?
Maybe it will make more sense tomorrow. Pray for Stella. Pray also for these foster parents to find forgiveness in their hearts. Pray for the one girl who is losing her family all over again.
Edited to add: The girl who had been with them for so long is back with them again.
Filed under: potty training
Without jinxing myself too much, Speedy is fully and completely potty trained and has been for some time now. He doesn’ even wear pull ups at night anymore. I honestly don’t remember the last accident we had.
We were playing out in the front yard earlier and he pulled his shirt up and started to assume the “potty position”. I said, “Speedy, if you need to potty go inside to the bathroom”. It is not uncommon for him to pee behind the bushes when we’re outside playing. It worked when we were in training and, honestly, it’s just easier than all of us having to go inside now. So I didn’t push it when he said he was going behind the bushes. I looked away for a minute and then when I looked back he had a funny look on his face and his pants were around his ankles. (not normal for peeing, he’s gotten quite good and only pulling out the necessary equipment and not even unbuttoning his pants)
I said, “Speedy, if you’re done, pull up your pants.” He said, (with eyes bulging a little) “I’m…..just…..going………ppp….ppoooooo”! “NOOOOO!, Speedy, we poo in the potty, not outside.” To which he replies, “unless we’re at Uncle John’s farm”. ha ha ha So I watched in horror as he pooped, standing behind the bushes. There was no squatting involved. At the same time, the little dog we are sitting ran across the street and was barking at some boys and I was trying to coral her as well.
Speedy somehow stepped in the poop and it also got on the back of his jeans (no squatting). Yuck. And let me just tell you, it STUNK! The story could end here, but what fun would that be?
We took off shoes and pants and went inside where he let me know he needed to go “finish”. I told him to stay on the potty until I got back there so I could clean his bottom. And here’s the really fun part. I told him to bend forward a little so I could wipe his butt – he bent over so far he had his hands on the floor. I had a great view. But hey, his butt is definitely clean now.
Filed under: Day after day
That’s what I got when I read this.
It is really just around the corner. And this is how insane I am this year, I’m making lists for the kids and I’ve put it all in tables complete with pictures, links, prices and descriptions.
I think Santa will be bringing a Step2 Dream Kitchen for both kids to find on Christmas morning. If your kids have a kitchen, please tell me what you like or don’t like about it.
Filed under: Speedy
The title says it all. The stomach flu comes complete with diarrhea which Speedy manages to make it to the restroom for, most of the time. Thankfully. This was our coversation this morning as he was sitting on the pot:
Speedy: ooooh! That looks like chicken.
Me: mmmm… it does?
Speedy: chicken diarrhea….(giggles)
Me: oh
Speedy: it looks like chicken nuggets, mommy!
Me: eeew!
Speedy: awww, there’s a little crabby
Me: ok
Speedy: poor little crab, he’s a diarrhea crab
I’ve heard of making pictures out of clouds, but never before diarrhea. So the next time you’re stuck on the pot….think of us. 
Filed under: Speedy
Last week Princess had Bronchitis. This week, I’m pretty sure Speedy has it. He is home from school today and I have a pile of work to do – real, paying work – which makes for an interesting morning. He is SUPPOSED to be playing in the playroom or watching TV but keeps finding excuses to come into my office. He is not supposed to be doing anything except watching tv or playing in the playroom -
Speedy: ooooh! Look what I found, mommy! (holding up a peppermint candy) Isn’t that silly?
Me: Where did you find that?
Speedy: I just found it. It was just there. I should probably eat it, huh?
Me: Was it in Daddy’s box?
Speedy: Yes, that’s where it was. It’s funny, isn’t it?
Me: No, it’s not funny when you get into daddy’s box.
Speedy: Well, I think I should just eat it.
Me: Fine. Just eat it. Stay out of daddy’s box.
Speedy: Yes m’am.
a few minutes later…..
Speedy: (carrying part of what I think may have been a curatin rod thingy…??? and not wearing a shirt) Uh oh. I broke it.
Me: Where was that?
Speedy: in the playroom. I just broke it. It was on the curtains.
Me: hmm….. leave it here and we’ll fix it in a bit. Mommy needs to work.
Speedy: Speedy needs to play.
a few more minutes go by
Speedy: ooooh! Look at this! (holding up a bottle of bubbles and trying to open it)
Me: Stop!
Speedy: I just found these bubbles.
My work day is over.
It’s 1:30am and I’m awake and typing at the computer. Something is very wrong with this picture – gone are the days when I can sleep until 10 in the morning so I have no business being awake at 1am. I’m justifying it with the knowledge that tomorrow around lunch time I’ll be heading out for the weekend and leaving the family at home.
That’s right, two nights and two days to myself. It’s the pre-deer season getaway. Funny thing is…..I kinda don’t want to go. I mean, what am I going to do for two days with no one to take care of? Although I don’t feel like I need it right now, I know it will be a long time before I have this opportunity again so I need to take it. Maybe I’ll catch up on some scrapbooking or something productive like that. Or maybe I’ll stay in my pajamas and watch movies all weekend. Either way, I’m going.
I met with a play therapist today and I really like him and feel really good about the approach he wants to take with Speedy. Speedy will meet with him next week and in preparation for that, we’ll tell Speedy we talked to someone we want him to meet blah blah blah blah blah….anyway, just to kind of lay the groundwork for that, this is the conversation I had with Speedy tonight:
Me: You know, baby, mommy and daddy have been a little worried about you. We know you’ve been having a tough time at school, huh?
Speedy: Yeah. That’s why I just shouldn’t go to school anymore. Not ever anymore.
Me: It sounds like you have really made up your mind that you don’t want to go to school anymore.
Speedy: Yeah. But I HAAALF to, huh?
Me: Well, I’ve had to go places I didn’t want to before but then I started liking it again. I think we can work on that and help you like school again.
Speedy: I just don’t want….I don’t want any of the friends to be there.
Me: You want to go to school and be there by yourself with just you and your teachers?
Speedy: YES! No friends there. Just ME!
Me: What would you do with just you and your teachers?
Speedy: I would run all around the room and they would run with me.
Me: That would be fun!
Speedy: And I would jump back and they would jump back.
Me: Would you still go to Library?
Speedy: No! No friends there. Just me.
Me: Yes, just you. But would you and your teachers still go to library and read books?
Speedy: YES!
Me: What about the playground? Would your teachers play with you or just watch you play?
Speedy: They would just watch me play. I want all the playground to be yellow. Mom, will you paint it all yellow for me?
Me: (I’d paint the whole world yellow for you, if I could) If everything on the playground was yellow, it would look like sunshine.
Speedy: Yeah! It would be yellow like the sun is yellow.
Me: I think we can work together to find a way for you to like school again.
Have I mentioned lately how much I love that kid?
Filed under: Speedy
Speedy had to fill in the blanks on a questionairre about his daddy. The results are below with his word in bold:
My Dad’s name is Daddy. My Dad is old old old years old. My Dad’s favorite food is honey and butter. (this is true) My Dad and I like to play games. My Dad is special because I like him to be special. My Dad scoops up dirt at work. My Dad’s favorite place to eat is Chuck E Cheese. When Dad gets home from work he likes to do nothing. I love my Dad because he plays with me.
.
I have not fallen off the face of the earth.
I have been feeling a bit overwhelmed with all the school and Speedy stuff. It’s just that he had such a rough start in life, I hate to see him struggle with this as well. I am very glad I have him in preschool and we can begin to address it now, before it starts to affect him academically. But still. I just want him to happy and I want things to not be so hard for him. Though I must say he hardly seems to notice that anything is hard at all. 
On the other hand, I know how God uses these things to make us stronger. I know everything we face helps to shape who we become. And I know that God has a beautiful plan for Speedy’s life. Do I really need to repeat it now or do you all know it by heart? Jeremiah 29:11…come on, who can leave it in the comments section WITHOUT looking it up? Anyone? Anyone?
DaddyO and I observed Speedy in Sunday School and children’s church this weekend and today I observed him for quite a while in school. He did fantastic on Sunday, today…well, not so much. It was great for me to see him with the other kids and see what they were doing compared to what he is doing. I know all kids are different and I don’t mean “compare” so much as get a feel what the norm may be for kids his age. When ALL the other kids are staying in their centers and Speedy lasts about 1.5 minutes in his, that tells me something. There were other things, too. He’s not malicious, he’s not mean, he’s just very enthusiastic about life and has a difficult time waiting his turn for the next best thing. (spoken like a true mom, eh?)
Tonight was “Dad’s night out” at the school and one of the other father’s came up to DaddyO and told him that when he asked his daughter what she was most looking forward to about this evening, she said, “Speedy!” So I guess he has a fan. It really felt good to hear that because I left school today fearing that Speedy would be one of those kids the other kids didn’t want to play with.
He’s just so darn cute. So here are pictures from this morning. It was finally cool enough for a long sleeve shirt (at least in the morning) so I thought I’d dress them in Halloween outfits. Princess has another adorable Halloween outfit but it was dirty – she’s already worn it a few times since it is short sleeve. The shirt Princess has on in the picture is the one Speedy wore last year. She was not having a good morning – yes, world, she does cry.
Okay, so it’s time for some showing off. Here are the pics from before school this morning:
and photos from the Pumpkin Patch:
Filed under: Marathon
Need I say more?
When you walk 2.5 miles to the school with the stroller, it is too late to realize this really wasn’t such a great idea. I didn’t die and I walked 5 miles. that has to count for something, right?
I honestly don’t know how I’ll ever be able to walk 13.1 miles. But I am going to do it. Even if it takes me all day.
I have no idea how Speedy did at school today – I didn’t ask. He didn’t have any accidents so that’s a good thing.
Just an official report. I did another 3 miles this morning, but took about 48 minutes. I was still hurting from the last time so I didn’t push it.
Yesterday afternoon I found myself sitting in the administrators’ office at Speedy’s school once again. Sigh. But this time I got some really great information. I was given specific examples of behavior issues that help me understand more what is happening in class. It’s been hard for me to really grasp because he’s not disrespectful or outright oppositional, just busy. Hyper maybe. I haven’t wanted to believe that he may really have ADHD and I still don’t, but I think it’s time to have someone who can be a little more objective take a closer look.
We’re going to have him evaluated by a professional and see if that is part of the problem and if it is, see what we can do to help. I am a big believer in early intervention so if there is something we can do now to make it easier on him later, then we need to get on top of it. I have some references and I’ve made a few calls. We’ll see how it goes.
Filed under: Speedy
So,
Brigitte got some scoop for me this morning on Speedy’s teacher. Seems I’m not the only mom who has been less than pleased. She ran into someone today who has a boy Speedy’s age who started out this school year in Speedy’s class. But her son didn’t like it at all and she got tired of hearing all bad things when she picked him up and just had an overall uneasy feeling about the teacher. So she had her son moved to the other class and now they both love it.
I feel somehow vindicated. Maybe that’s not the right word. At least I’m not the only one who has had issues with this teacher. Sadly, I think it is just a lack of experience in working with this age group. I’m sure by the end of the year she is going to be wonderful, but there is surely a learning curve when you are teaching 3 year olds.
Filed under: Marathon
Wow. It is unseasonably hot and humid here which doesn’t make it easy to be exercising outside. I found a SUPER deal on a double jogging stroller from craigslist and we used it this morning to walk 3 miles in 45 minutes! That’s 3 miles pushing a combined weight of about 50lbs – considering they were in the stroller and the laws of physics I have no idea what that actually added to the workout, if anything. It definitely made manuevering a little more difficult.
Anyway, THREE MILES! I’m proud. I’m still putting in time at the gym, but I’m also going to try to walk at least twice a week. Maybe more. The kids seemed to like the stroller and Speedy liked playing “I spy” as we went through the neighborhood.
I do have to confess that mine is not a body meant for running. I did jog a little – a VERY little – and I thought I was going to die. I’m hoping that every time we go, I’ll be able to jog just a little bit more. I have no intention of running the marathon, but I want to make the time limits which means I’ll probably have to jog at least a little bit of the way.
Sigh. What have I gotten myself into.
I also need to get moving on the fundraising front. When you click on the link it asks if you want to donate $35, $135, $810 or $1600 – I wish I could change that because it seems a little confusing. There is also the option to select $other and enter your own amount. If I can find 1000 people to donate a dollar, well, you can do the math.
You know, I hope I will always be a cool mom. I’m sure I’ll never be cool in my kids’ eyes (especially when they’re teenagers) but as long as I’m cool in my own eyes, that’s all that really matters. Right?
We made Halloween decorations today – painted brown paper lunch sacks and transformed them into pumpkins. Painted coffee filters and made pumpkins. But best of all, we painted some bats I printed from the internet and now they are flying around my den. I tied one to each of the four blades on our ceiling fan (with fishing line) and taped a dime to each one to give it some weight. The kids went nuts when they saw them flying around the room. Princess calls them “tweet tweets” (her name for birds).
I love that Speedy thinks I’m his best friend right now. I know he will grow out of that one day – probably much sooner than I’d like – but I love that when I asked him tonight to name a friend he likes to play with, he pointed to me. I love that when someone at my mom’s office asked him his name and he replied “sharkboy” – then she said she was “lavagirl” and he said, “no, my mommy’s lavagirl”. On vacation, when we were in the pool and he’d float a little away from me, he’d yell “come back! come back! You’re my best friend!”
I guess at some point if your son still thinks of you as his best friend it becomes a little creepy, but for now it makes me feel like the king of the world.
In other news, I’m writing a book. Before you get all excited and start searching Amazon for my name as the author, you should know only one copy will be printed. There is a book called “How I was Adopted” that I really like and it tells the story of how a girl named Samantha was adopted. Speedy loves to read it and throughout it asks questions about his adoption that he can now readily answer. It’s simple and straightforward and I’m going to create one for him with is own pictures in it and change the words up a little to fit our story more. I’ll make one for Princess, too.
I started a photo album / story book a long time ago but I was never really happy with it. I think I tried to give too much detail and this time around I’ll focus on keeping it much simpler.
Yep. That was me today. The school called about a half hour before I was to pick the kids up and let me know that Speedy had another accident. She was calling because the teacher told her I wanted to be called…..but that was only if they thought he did it intentionally. Which, in this case, he didn’t. Not really, anyway. I’ve been a little emotional all afternoon but this just really capped it all off. I LOVE the lady I talk to all the time at the school, I think she is the secretary or something…I don’t know but I just love her and she adores Speedy.
Phone rings. My heart drops when I see the number because I know it is the school. here is the conversation:
Me: hello
School: Hi, this is so and so from the school….
Me: CRAP! What do you want? (laughing, because I know her and she laughs too)
School: laughing, well, Speedy had another accident today
Me: Was it on purpose?
School: Well, I don’t think so. Immediately afterwards he went and told the teacher so I’m thinking it wasn’t. He was on the playground.
Me: Okay. Thanks for letting me know. I was mainly wanting to be called if he did it on purpose.
School: The teacher said she had everyone go to the potty right before they went outside, but Speedy refused to go.
Me: Wait. He REFUSED to go? Was that really an option? I mean, he’s 3.
School: Yeah, I hear you. I was wondering about that too.
Me: I’ve talked with the teacher about his before….he’ll always say no if you ask him but she has to make him go or he’ll have an accident. I don’t know what to do or how to explain this to her without stepping on her toes…..she must exercise her authority as the teacher and make sure he goes to the potty. It can not be optional with him.
School: I can take care of that, don’t worry. You’re right, he can’t just be given the option. He is not the only one that way and he needs supervision while he’s in there, too.
Me: Yes, I agree.
School: I’ll change him and we’ll see you in a bit.
Me: Okay, thanks.
I hang up the phone and I cry. I’m just so sick and freakin’ tired of hearing all the bad things (that are really relatively minor on their own, they just add up) he does. I can’t remember ever being told about something good he’s done at school and I’m just afraid that all the teachers see is the bad or frustrating things.
Speedy has a lot of energy and I have no doubt that he gives his teachers a run for their money. But I need to know that his teachers adore him. If they don’t, they need to pretend. I have been very objective up until now and have listened openly and offered suggestions and reinforced at home….. I’ve done everything I can think of. Now I’m just sick of it. I hate taking him to school in the morning and I spend the day dreading the sound of my phone ringing. I get nervous about picking him up because I’m afraid of what they’ll have to say.
I think if I could just hear one thing good a long with the bad, then it would be better. Just reassure me that you are aware that Speedy also has good behavior and is really sweet. I mean, do you not get that you are talking about MY BABY? Hell, I know he can be dififcult, I do live with him, after all. But I also know that while he can be a challenge, he also responds well to authority and praise. And he is really a very sweet kid. He’s just a little enthusiastic about life….
I have to say that his teacher is really nice. I am sure that she is doing everything she can and is frustrated a bit as well. I just need to know that she is able to see more than just the negative behavior. I also need to be confident that she knows how to be in charge of my son and not let him just do what he wants.
So, about the blubbering. I went in a little early to pick them up and stopped in the office. I really though I had it together but I walked in and immediately started crying. I’m sure I looked like a lunatic. We had a nice talk and they did tell me that the teacher had said up until that point he had a super day. The teacher told them before the accident she was all ready to tell me what a wonderful day he had. I was glad to hear that they told her “mommy still needs to hear that”. So I think they at least get it. They were very nice and supportive. I reiterated that I’m not complaining about the teacher that I think she’s nice, I just need to know that she is able to see the good and the bad, not just the bad.
Did I mention that I kept crying like a blubbering idiot? What an idiot. I really don’t know what came over me. I guess between Sunday School and preschool I’ve just about had it.
Okay, so as long as I’m complaining, let me add the Sunday School bit to it. First off, 3 is way too young to sit in a “children’s church” environment. PER EEE UUUDD You simply can not expect most 3 year olds to be able to sit still and quiet and just listen to a story in an auditorium like setting for more than a few minutes. Second, when Daddyo picked Speedy up from Sunday School this past Sunday, they told him that Speedy “poured his water out” TWICE. Okay, the first time he pours his water out, shame on Speedy. The SECOND time he does it, shame on the teacher for freakin’ giving it back to him. They asked daddyo to bring a sippy cup for him next week. Sorry. Not going to happen. If Speedy pours his water out then he just doesn’t need to have it. He’ll get it after having to go without once or twice.
And the Sunday before that when we were there, I left feeling like I just never wanted to go back. And I’m pretty heavily involved in our church. I can only imagine how the parents who might not be very involved felt if they got the same little speech I got. (I heard the same speech being given to another couple as I was leaving) Basically, it all boils down to children’s ministries needing more volunteers but the way it was brought up was just plain rude.
I LOVE my church. I know all churches have issues. I really enjoy the people at my church and what I feel is happening there. I just had a bad day. And I felt bad for the other parents who came after me who I hadn’t seen before. If they were new or visiting, I can promise you they will not be back. And I don’t blame them. Why is it that when adults behave poorly at church it hurts so much more than in other places? I guess the expectations are just higher.
So anyway, the really ironic part of that Sunday was I was listening to a grown up complaining about Speedy’s behavior and exhibiting her own bad behavior as she did so. I really wanted to point that out, but it wouldn’t have been in Speedy’s best interest. Not long ago, I listened to several moms answer the following question:
“When did you first really feel like a mom?” The answers varied from sleepless nights to vomit to poop. I really couldn’t think of an answer. I guess I “felt” like a mom long before I actually became one, because we prayed for so long and waited for so long. Now I know the answer. I know I am REALLY a mom because I am able to control my tongue in the best interest of my child. When I want to rip someone a new one, I am actually able to refrain from doing so because I know it will only count against Speedy eventually. You see, all the rules about behaving nicely at church don’t apply to me – I’d really like to rip someone a new one. How’s that for irony?
I’m so thankful that I serve a God who offers me unconditional Grace. I pray He helps me offer that to others as well.
Filed under: Marathon
Okay, so I’ve been going to the gym regularly and all but today I actually started walking outside. UGH! I am pleased to report that I walked 1.5 miles in 20 minutes – with two kids! One in a stroller and one on a little Big Wheels thingy and we stopped twice to drink water. Not too shabby, but I’ve got a long ways to go.
What I really need is a double jogging stroller – those things are pretty stinking expensive, even at the resale shops. So, if you have one or know someone who does and it is just collecting dust, I’d love to borrow it!
Any I’m still taking sponsors, by the way.
