My Ebenezer

Most women, and yes I do mean women, still have a hidden fantasy of being a princess. It starts the moment we see pink ruffles or watch Cinderella – this deep desire to be rescued by Prince Charming. We catch a lot of flack over it – usually by the men. But I’ve got this theory that they, too, have their own deep rooted desire to be………..you guessed it, Prince Charming. Maybe not the charming part, but the rescue part.

It’s why they don’t mind getting off the couch during their favorite tv program to catch a gecko that has you scared out of your wits. Or kill the cockroach crawling on the floor as you scream and stand on the furniture. Get them off the couch to help you with the dishes? Yea, right. Not a chance. But if you see a spider in the bathtub as you’re getting in, you can bet they will come running to save you.

Last night, Daddy-O was sound asleep. It was about midnight and I was in the den watching tv and playing on the computer. All the lights were out in the den except for the glow of my computer screen and the television. For just a split second, the whole den lit up and then immediately went away. Almost like what you’d expect if there was lightening outside or something. So that’s what I thought it was – heat lightening. After it happened a few times, I got an uneasy feeling as I realized all the blinds were closed and no way could heat lightening be generating that much light in my den.

I wondered if someone were shining a high beam light through the window in our front door. I waited…..waited….and there it was again. You’d be amazed at how quickly I can get the laptop off my lap and run into the bedroom to wake my husband when I’m scared. Daddy-O was instantly wide awake and running to the front window. I felt so bad waking him up because he had to work early this morning. But he insisted it was okay, he would “check things out.”

From a very sound sleep, Daddy-O instantly turned in to heroic man with puffy chest and x-ray vision as he looked through every window for possible perpetrators. After about 10 minutes, he decided whoever it was had given up the hoax and left so he went back to sleep after carefully checking all the locks.

Fast forward 5 minutes. I see the lights again and this time I’m really freaked out. Even though I know it is just one of our redneck neighbors (no offense, Jeff ha ha ha) or some kids, I’m really scared. Too scared even to get up this time so I just holler for Daddy-O. I wasn’t sure he heard me but soon realized that the moment he heard my voice he was out of the bed and to the front bedroom window lickety split. My hero.

My hero who then decided to go outside and look around for the pranksters. At midnight. In his underwear. So as I’m peeping through the front window watching my big strong hero walk through the street in HIS UNDERWEAR, it becomes clear to me that the perpetrator is in the house. The light was coming from inside my house. AFter only a instant of panic, I started to giggle.

It was the tv. Yes, the one I had been sort of watching in the den. You know how when the scene changes the way the whole room is lit up changes, too? Well, I came to the conclusion that because my eyes were focused on the computer screen instead of the tv, that when the scenes started changing it appeared out of the corner of my eye to be a light shining in from outside. THis is what occurred to me while Daddy-O was storming the streets in his underwear looking for the boogie man.

When he came back in he sat in a chair where he could see out the front window and kept watch for about 15 minutes. I suggested that because I was tired and it was so late that perhaps my mind was just playing tricks on me and it was the light from the tv. He kept watching. Finally, I convinced him to go back to bed and I went also.

I still think it was the tv, but let’s just keep that between you and me, okay?

10 more days.